Review : Salaam Namaste

On the juvenile-O-meter this film fares a little better than “Hum-tum” , i.e.; it’s a little less juvenile. The story seemed to be actually interesting, until director Anand infused it with a dose of Hindi film surrealism. Direction is adequate although the screenplay certainly isn’t; certain situations seem to hiccup in execution. The script is riddled with improbabilities. On the bright side though, the songs are hum-able and well-shot, the Australian locales are beautiful, and the film has great dollops of comedy which shore it up no end.Ambar Malhotra (Zinta) is a student-doctor in Melbourne, radio-jockeying part-time to pay the bills. Her program’s name is “Salaam Namaste“. She comes into contact with architect-turned-chef Nikhil Arora, when he doesn’t turn up for a interview on her radio program. Infuriated by his lack of punctuality and courtesy (no apology etc.) she sets out to defame him via the air-waves. When Nick calls her up to reproach her for her offensive words against him, they give each other an earful.

 

Nikhil prefers to be called Nick and is the chef of restaurant Nick-of-Time. At a marriage where his resaturant is catering the food, Nick meets Ambar, although the two not having seen each other, have no idea that the other is anathema. Nick introduces himself as an architect, and Ambar introduces herself as a student surgeon. The attraction is strong and doesn’t diminish even when the two realise each other’s true identities. They end up falling in love, and moving in together into a glorious villa by the sea.

All is hunky-dory until Ambar gets pregnant . . .

The first half is juvenile fare, and bears great similarity to Hum-tum. The second-half is tolerable. Saif and Priti act decently enough, with Priti at her shrillest best. Warsi as Nick’s friend is good and adds to the comedy. Tania Zaetta as Susan, Warsi’s wife in the film is just about OK. However, Javed Jafri steals the show as a desi-Aussie “Crocodile Dundee” style landlord, with his wonderful English, his “Sorry” spouting Aussie girlfriend and classic “mis-quotes” such as “When in Rome, do the Romans”. Abhishek Bachhan in the latter-half slapstick scenes displays a flair for the comic. Jugal Hansraj as Ambar’s fellow student doen’t have much of a role, and pretty much serves as the shoulder to cry on.

Now for the kinks. Similar to Hum-tum, SN also tries oh-so-hard to be oh-so-cool. When taking in Saif’s bachelor pad for the first time we see objects like a cap with the words “Work Sucks”, a goldfish bowl, a laptop etc — all the evidence needed to prove how hip the guy is. When he clambers out of bed, he wears “Superman” logo-ed shorts, flexes his biceps, and mutters “Oh, crap” every chance he gets. Such a display of “hip-ness”, it makes me light-headed. Ms. Zinta’s character doesn’t lag too far behind. A student-doctor with far too much free time on her hands (sure don’t make the Indian dames work too hard in Aussie-land, do they ?); she employs it to party, RJ, decorate and watch movies.

Although based on an interesting premise, i.e.; exploring the live-in relationship, the film fails to get to the meat of the matter, being content to wallow in shallow, frothy waters. The sets and the clothes, and the “look” is well-detailed. The dialogues and situations are not. At the marriage where Ambar and Nick meet, everyone is young and yuppie, no older folks and no children are present (whatever happened to friends and family ?). After the ceremony the entire marriage party throws off their dressy outfits to reveal swimsuits and revel in an impromptu song-and-dance beach party. After the beach party, tents conveniently sprout up on the sand, and all nod off for a siesta. Kind of a hard to believe scenario, unless someone tells me that such marriages-cum-beach parties-cum-slumber parties are de rigeur in the land down under.

In such a yuppie, young, urban film, the thing I’d least expected to see was the display of women in a deragatory/patriarchial light. But it’s there nonetheless, whether it be in Nick’s comparison of a wife and a mistress (he’s using it as an analogy for dish presentation, no less), or his callow, use-and-throw attitude towards a woman with whom he’s apparently spent the night. Really, even for Hindi films, can we not have a single grown-up hero, one who’ll not give in to the “boys-will-be-boys” charade ? More breaks in reality come in the form of Ambar’s prancing and dancing abilities when massively pregnant with twins. Obviously the director has never been pregnant, but has he SEEN pregnant women ?

OK, what it boils down to is – if you liked “Hum-tum” you will love SN. If like me you though Hum-Tum was pathetic, you might want to wait for “Salaam Namaste”‘s DVD release.