Review : Apna Sapna money money

Rating : Worse than I imagined (0/5)
Genre : Comedy
Year : 2006
Running time : 2 hours 30 minutes
Director : Sangeeth Sivan
Cast : Reitesh Deshmukh, Celina Jaitley, Shreyas Talpade, Ria Sen, Anupam Kher, Suniel Shetty, Koena Mitra

APNA SAPNA MONEY MONEY : Descent into stupidity

This is a hare-brained adventure. Torturous to the extreme, that it makes you wonder what (sins) you’ve done to deserve it.

The story is a cop and robber chase, the robber here transporting diamonds (worth 50 crores). Bamboozling their way into the already rickety story-line are a bunch of buffoons – one small-time conman Kishan (Rietesh), one honest mechanic Arjun (Talpade) and his true love Shivani (Riya Sen) and her dad (Kher), one wannabe singer Julie (Koena Mitra), and an assorted cast of village folk, all with hearts of shining gold. There is also, in case you are losing hope, a dog, with admirable “fetching” capabilities.

So, there’s Jackie Shroff as Carlos, a bankrupt and extremely inept mafia don. His associate Sania (Jaitley) is transporting smuggled diamonds via train, but pursued by Inspector Namane (Shetty) and in a crunch, places them in an old man’s bag. The old man is actually trickster Kishan in disguise, and carries the diamonds away unwittingly. Later when a couple of gangs get a whiff of the wealth, there ensues a grand mela of sorts with everyone vying for the loot.

There is promise in the story, and with such a large cast of characters, the possibilities endless. And in the early post-intermission phase it looks like things might come together into a coherent plot. It doesn’t happen though, and the film sags into inanity. The movie also attempts to be “spoofy” – with the digs at “Sarkar”, and all the refrains from Subhash Ghai’s earlier films. However it’s badly done, and the terrible humor (it’s not slapstick, it’s not comedy, it’s insufferable) doesn’t help either.

The director wields his baton loosely. The story-line is sparse and embellished with various un-related happenings, so it’s easy to lose track of the diamond chase. The conversation in the film comprises of lots of crude dialogue and double entendres. The characters are un-believable and inconsistent. The screenplay – non-existent. The situations are out-of-the-world and I mean that unkindly. Take for example the encounter between Kishan and Sania in a second-class compartment on the train. Sania, is sprawled on, of all things a second-class berth, wearing a low necked, slit-up-the-thigh ball-gown in broad daylight. And she sprawls in a fashion which allows even the most casual passer-by an eyeful of leg and cleavage. The script-writer definitely has rocks in his head.

The kind of acting this film requires anyone could do, even Koina Mitra – she’s the worst. And there seems something really odd about her face, because she seems pretty android-ish. She’d do well as the next “Jadoo” (Rakesh Roshan, please take note). As far as “acting” goes, they all mumble the odd dialogue as well as the next person. Jackie Shroff has trouble with the mumbling though – why doesn’t he retire ? Chunky Pande’s career sinks beyond redemption – he acts as a Nepali gangster. Talpade (ooh – bad, bad hair day) and Kher could do better than act in such films. Jaitley and Mitra attribute to the “oomph” factor, while Ms.Sen remains subdued in churidaars. It suits her – she must remain subdued and out of films.

This is, by popular opinion, a movie devoid of common-sense. However, even if you were to banish all logical thought processes from your mind, stop thinking for a while, and lose all sense of reason, this would still be an atrocious, absurd, absolutely non-sensical film – which is why it gets the super-negative rating.

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