As boring as Hrithik Roshan in “Koffee with Karan”. Really, the guy can have the fittest body in all of Bollywood, but is he witty ? NO. He tries, yes, he does. But does he succeed ? NO. In KWK he was so amazingly inane that he threatened to take the crown from the master of inanities – Govinda himself. I could see Priyanka Chopra, the other guest, being bored to bits (like me). And though otherwise she might have been a fun girl, her boat was dragged down by Hrithik’s sinking ship.

Now, why can’t everyone be as sparkly as SRK ?

Boring was one thing Mallika Sherawat was not (on the latest instalment of KWK – get wired people, or get TVed or whatever). Anything but. She was svelte, silly, and suffered from a massive case of superiority complex (and she said so). Now, I can see why the Karan Johars of the world poke fun at her with such impunity. I mean, that girl is cooking her own goose. And it’s not rare, that goose, it’s well done.

Bhansali, the other guest with Mallika, was a mix of the anti-social and the I’m-so-good-I-can’t-get-better. He seemed greatly enamoured with his own films (he hadn’t watched any others), and was, by turns, sweet and obnoxious to Mallika (he wanted her to have acting, dance and diction lessons). He kept saying he had an inferiority complex, although it was nowhere in evidence.

Sunday, I was spoilt for choice, because the Oscar Awards overlapped “Koffee”. And since was too lazy to record either, kept flipping between them. And in the middle of all that flipping caught Nicole Kidman, reed-thin and beautiful in a flaming red gown. Gorgeous as she is, I thought she looked rather like a big, red, bow.