Review : Singh is kinng

Rating : The Worst (0/5)
Genre : Comedy / Drama
Year : 2008
Running time : 2 hours 15 minutes
Director : Anees Bazmee
Cast : Akshay Kumar, Katrina Kaif, Ranvir Shourie, Neha Dhupia, Om Puri, Javed Jaffrey, Sonu Sood, Manoj Pahwa
Kid rating : PG

SINGH IS KING : DUMBED-DOWN MASALA !

Ever have a child tell you a story ? My son makes his up on the fly – oh, you know, Mom and then, and then, . . . the cow jumps over the moon . . . And he says this with the enthusiasm of a confident story-teller, who knows that his concoction will be well-received. It is indeed.

“Singh is King’s” scriptwriter reminds me of my son. There are similarities, in that the scriptwriter’s seem like they are making up the story on the fly. Like you know what would be fun now – after we get the rustic Sardar out of the hinterlands of the Punjab, let’s get him to get replace an Australian Don, and then just for kicks, let’s get him into a jet-ski and crash into a helicopter, and then, . . . let’s put in a totally unrealistic song in Egypt, when these folks are actually in Australia ! However there are key differences here – I am not THEIR mother, and I’m paying to hear/see this story ! Besides, my son tells much better stories.

You will thus gather that I’m not enthused about “Singh is Kinng”. Yes, yes, Akshay is fantastic, he throws himself into his character energetically and gives it his best shot. And Katrina is stunning (so what if she can’t act ?), but even they, this impossibly gorgeous pair, can’t save this film. There are many reasons to hate this film as I hate it, and I promise to list them all here.

Firstly the film is boring. It’s silly, not funny, and there is a distinction, my friends ! Situations which have been used for ages to inspire laughter are used here again. Take for example the hen-chasing scene which has Akshay attempting to catch an errant hen so that it can be eaten. I must have seen similar situations is countless Bachhan-esque films, and by now it’s gotten jaded.

SIK has characters you couldn’t care about if you tried. And it has events which occur randomly, and which amount to nothing. Twists and turns in this film are like candy, you think the audience might be getting a little bored right about now ? – just slip them one. It’s like we are all antsy children with short attention spans.

Oh, and the story, the backbone of the film – what shall I tell you about it ? It does, as I have mentioned before, meander down very unexpected and outlandish paths. It shows a total lack of coherence and logic; a goal-less kind of film, where anything goes.

Happy Singh (Akshay) is a happy-go-lucky do-gooder who ends up doing more harm than good. In a ruse to get him out of the village, the villagers hatch a plan to send him to Australia to reform and bring back an erstwhile son of the village Lucky Singh (Sonu Sood), who has turned into a gangster (The King) in the land down under. Thus Happy Singh sets off with good friend Rangeela (Om Puri) in tow to reform “The King”.

En route, in Egypt, Happy meets the woman of his dreams Sonia (Katrina). On reaching Australia, through an awkward turn of events, the real gangster – The King is hurt, and Happy Singh becomes “The King” in his place. He has also by this time, met a motherly types (Kirron Kher) and her daughter, who turns out to be none other than Sonia ! However Sonia has richie-rich boyfriend Puneet (Ranvir Shourie) in tow this time, and Happy, bound by his duty and good-heartedness to Sonia’s Mom, must do the needful to get Sonia and Puneet married.

And all this while running the King’s gang, handling petty rivalries between gang members and lunacy and chaos in general. Does Happy manage to do good and get the girl ?

OK, so what works ? Akshay Kumar. He totally rocks. He totally rocks in this absolutely dumb movie too. There are quite a few songs in the film, out of which “Jee karda”, “Bas ek king”, and “Teri ore” are catchy and well picturised.

I must say that I went in to see this film, with not very high expectations. It’s directed by Anees Bazmee, which tells me something. However reviews I read prior to viewing the film led me to believe that this film would be a breezy, if brainless ride. I have to say with much regret that it is not, because even discounting the other stuff – the illogical, the senseless, and the crappy, it’s not breezy – it’s boring. SIK is not just bad, its walk-out-midway bad, and if it were not for my kids (super-huge Akshay fans) I would’ve done just that.

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